Sunday, April 14, 2013


 "friendship, friendship,
Just a perfect blendship,
When other friendships have been forgot
Ours will still be hot!"

-Anything Goes

There is one universal truth I have learned over the years and it is this: you learn a lot about the people around you in an emergency situation, and you may be surprised. I have also learned that you learn who your true friends are when disaster strikesm you also learn who you van count on and who you can't

In 2004 when my non-functioning kidney(long story) got infected, I was in the worst possible pain of my life to date. I walked around, sick as a dog and in chronic pain for over a month. The day I finally dececided I should probably go to the hospital- I didn't have insurance at the time so I was terrified to seek  out medical care- I made the most telling decision of my life, instead of calling my live-in boyfriend, I called my friend Kyle. I knew my boyfriend had something going on that day that he wouldn't leave to take me to the ER, something deep in my gut told me Kyle was the right choice, and she was. Kyle was on lunch break at her job, about thirty minutes away, she got to me in 15 minutes after hearing my tearful plea for a ride. She then took me to the ER and wauted with me in the waiting room, she came into the back with me while I waited for my blood test results, the cat scan results and my boyfriend, who she called for me, finally after a couple hours my diagnosis came down, I had a "rip roarin'" kidney infection in my non-functional kidney, who I had named Harvey(yes, I like to nam e my subordinate body parts), the kidney had formed an absess and birst, so that guy had to come out.

Kyle stayed at the hospital til I was settled in my room, she proceeded to visit with me everyday, almost all day long for the week was there, once I was released, she became my nurse caring for the tubes, they had inserted to drain my kidney, a job, the boyfriend didn't want or offer to do. Truly, Kyle went above and beyond for me.
Then in 2011, I had a stroke, in childbirth, When I came to from surgery, I asked Matt to call some frinds to tell them what had just happened, Kyle, Dexter and Sheila.

Needless to say none of them knew what to do, since they were all in different states. So, Sheila took to the internet on my behalf, putting up a note on Facebook, informing all of those who loved me of what had just happened and giving ideas of how to cheer me on, thank goodness I didn't have to do that myself! The first time I signed onto Facebook I was greeted with an overwhelming amount of messages of support and encouagement, how uplifting. Then, Sheila contacted The Feminist Breeder, my favorite blogger, TFB ran a greeting card campaign for me, well, I recieved so many cards from all over the worl, women sharing their stories with me, giving me support and it couldn't have come at a better time, I stll pull those cards out when I'm feeling down, what a thpoughtful gift from a distsnt friend.

I feel lodt without Kyle here, some days

And then the most unexpected thing happened: I made a friend!A few years ago, Matt's mom got remarried, her husband ha a daughter, Amanda, Amands is a deeply empathetic and caring individual, even though she had never met me, she couldn' sleep until she heard I was OK the night everything happened. Once I was in rehab, she wanted to meet me, so I did. I don't remember much about the first time I met Amsnda, I was still in my post-stroke haze and tired from a full day of therapy, we didn't sau much to each other, Amanda being a little shy and me not knowing what to say to put her at ease.

When I was released from the hospital, Amsnda was staying at our house. this was the time she got to know me. Honestly, I have no idea why shr likes me so much, since this was the first time she spent any significant time with me, the first week home, was the darkest time of my life and I was a whiny, whimpering, wounded baby the whole time Amsanda was visitiing and now, I consider her the closest friend I have, the fact that she could overlook all of my issues during those early days to get to the good stuff that is inside me shows that I have found a true kindred spirit, someone who has seen me at my worst and still loves me what's the point, Liz?Your friend will show themselves to you when you need them most, keep them close and hold onto the good ones, they are like gold.

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