Friday, September 21, 2012

Two Steps Forward annnd...

So remember how I proudly proclaimed that I had landed in the final and blissful stage of grief, acceptance? Little did I know you could backslide into the stages you've already conquered supposedly.

Due to mutile factors I revisited my old frien Denial, reminisced with barganing and finally, at the end of the day, I crumpled into bed and sobbed my face off as Matt cradled my broken body and treid his best to domfort my tortured soul, I was smack dab in the middle of depression, again. ready to throw in the towel loudly proclaiming, "Idon't lie this anymore." to which Matt replied, "You liked it in the first place?" giving me his best one eyebrow raised quizzical look. But, just like, Annie said, the sun came out today and I feel relieved and relaxed this morning, maybe I needed a good cry, who knows. I spend so much time trying to be dtrong for Charlotte, so she won't see the chinks in her "strong" mother's armor and mybe not think less of me because I am not fully functioning mother, s good friend of mine told me that sometimes I just need to be weak and last night I was, and it felt good to give into that, just that one time.

No comments:

Post a Comment