last night Ifell into the depths of despair and as usual my husband managed to talk me down or up ou t of the depths, forcing me to reevaluate my view on the entire situation. In my opinion when a person is faced with the kind of challenge Iam faced with finding a motivating factor to keep goig is essentialca \\and searchiand fsearchongfor indpiring people to emulate is helpful Ihavebeen focusing primarily onChristophr Reevopher Reeve,but last night I had a moment of claity as my husband put Charlotte to bed.Ifrecovery never comes, which is highly unlikely, considering my progress so f r, I can still be a mother to my child and Ican be a positive influence in her life. only if Ichange my attitudeIf Charlotte is going to grow up with a partialy disabled mother. she shouldn't be raised by a mother who has given up on life who is mad at the world, she sshouldbe raised by a mother who still enjoys all that life has to offer regardless of th twists and turns life throws at her
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Sometimes we are forced to do things the hard way! But for the better outcome for everyone. XO
ReplyDeleteI should have added to my previous post -- that it's OK to cry and rage against the cards that the universe has dealt you! All feelings are valid! Love, Mom
ReplyDeletethanks for the insight, mom. while Iknow it is totally unreasonable for me to be mad and sad it is much better for my state of mind and those around me, especially Charlotte, if Itry to stay posiive rather than siting aroud all day feeling sorry for myself and worse case scenarioing.
ReplyDeleteEven though I can't be with you physically, I like to think I'm with you spiritually, since I think about this a lot. I got really teary-eyed reading this, not because of your struggles, but because of your courage. Like Christopher Robin said, you're a lot stronger and braver then you think, Liz. I only wish I could be as strong as you are.
ReplyDeleteFor some reason, I always keep thinking of the song Memory from Cats when I think about you. I know you don't really like it, but you have to look hopeful to the future. Keep that motivation of being strong for Charlotte, and I know you'll find the courage we all know you have.
...And I've rambled on enough, haha. Sorry, I can't stop when I get going. All my love to you, Liz! :D
Liz can you tell that your writing and syntax is getting better? I can tell just in the little bit of time I have been following your blog. You are improving, I can tell. Think of the example you are showing Charlotte, how to overcome adversity, how to persevere, how to show grace under pressure. You already are doing what a good mother does, you are setting a good example for your daughter.
ReplyDeleteI can't wait until I crash your first mother/daughter viewing of "Anne of Green Gables"! The "depths of despair" is a classic Anne phrase and just like Anne, you are brave and loved by so many. You are such a role model to all of us lucky enough to know you! Keep asking for what you need and know that so many of us are cheering you on. Love ya Liz!
ReplyDeleteNancy, you are more than welcome to crash that happy event! whenever Iam in the depths Ialways picture her lying in that bed with green hair and remember that tomorrow is fresh, wth no mistakes in it yet
ReplyDelete