On A Bender

Today I went on a pity party bender while I was working with my OT, Sue, I don't really know what brought it on, we were working on my arm, a constant source of frustration and from there I began bigeing on the liquor of despair calling myself stupid multiple times and declaring myself a retarded cripple whose daughter will eventually be embarrased of some day due to my retardation. Now that I'm sleeping off the effects of said bender, I feel silly, because I am neither stupid nor retarded and Charlotte will be embarrased of me someday, but for all the right reasons, because I am using my right as a parent to embarrass my teenage daughter.As I walked out of therapy I instituted a new rule for myself: no more negative self-talk period. If I sart going there, I am to remind myself of how much headway I've made and of all of the important lessons I've learned.